The book of Proverbs warns us twice, saying, “There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death” (Proverbs 14:12; 16:25). This highlights the tendency of humans to follow their own paths instead of adhering to biblical teachings. Sad to say, this behavior is also evident among many who claim to be Christians.
The Christian walk is filled with challenges. There’s a reason Christ said, “And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household” (Matt. 10:36). Family and loved ones have a significant impact—both positive and negative—on our journey with Christ Jesus.
In Matthew 12:46-50, while Jesus was speaking to a crowd, He was interrupted by someone who told Him, “Your mother and brothers are outside wanting to speak to you.” This raises some questions: Why weren’t Jesus’ mother and brothers listening to Him? Didn’t they realize that His ministry was far more important than what they wanted to say? Couldn’t they wait until later to talk to Him?
Some suggest that His earthly family was simply concerned for His well-being, which we’ll explore further. However, from within its context, Jesus responded, “Who is My mother, and who are My brothers?” He then pointed to His disciples and said, “Here are My mother and My brothers! For whoever does the will of My Father in heaven is My brother and sister and mother” (Matt. 12:48-50).
Did Jesus suggest that His earthly mother, Mary, and His siblings by Joseph were not acting according to the will of God the Father? This raises questions about whether their actions were solely motivated by concern for His well-being. At least, that doesn’t seem to be the main point of the narrative. Additionally, John noted, “For not even His brothers believed in Him” (John 7:5).
When Jesus was twelve years old, Mary and Joseph realized He was missing. After finding Him in the temple, where He was discussing matters with the teachers, Jesus asked them, “Why were you looking for Me? Did you not know that I must be in My Father’s house?” At this moment, Luke made a notable remark: they did not understand what He was saying to them (Luke 2:49-50).
This is not to say that Christ was against His earthly family; on the contrary, He valued family. Paul’s teaching in 1 Timothy 5:8 states, “But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” This, among many other messages, emphasizes the importance of caring for your family. As Christians, our family is our first ministry—we should share the message of Jesus Christ with them. However, we must be cautious; if our family does not follow Christ, they can become a hindrance to our spiritual walk with Him.
In John 15, Jesus told His disciples, “Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself unless it abides in the vine, neither can you unless you abide in Me” (John 15:4). This means that no Christian can bear fruit without being connected to Christ Jesus. Jesus went on to say, “If anyone does not abide in Me, he is thrown away like a branch and withers; and the branches are gathered, thrown into the fire, and burned” (John 15:6). This language indicates judgment; for more insight, refer to Matthew 3:7-10.
True disciples of Christ Jesus bear much fruit, thereby glorifying God the Father. In John 15:7-8, Jesus declared, “If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. By this, My Father is glorified—that you bear much fruit and prove to be My disciples.”
Jesus’ statement, “Ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you,” should not be interpreted as a simple promise of “claim and receive,” as some professing Christians suggest. Instead, it is meant for Christians who genuinely aspire to bear fruit and become true disciples of Jesus Christ.
True disciples of Christ Jesus remain in Him and in His Word. This serves as a warning to us Christians who believe we can stay connected to Christ without engaging with His Word. Believing in Christ cannot be separated from knowing His teachings. In other words, if we claim to have faith in Jesus Christ, we must also honor His Word. To honor Christ’s Word, we should be doers of it, not just hearers.
It’s important to remember that, in Christ’s parable, only the good soil—the one who hears the Word and understands it—will bear fruit (see Matthew 13:23). When tempted by the devil, Jesus responded, “It is written, ‘Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God’” (Matthew 4:4).
Not all Christians have the privilege of having a family that shares their faith. Some must navigate the complex relationship between their family ties and their commitment to Christ, as well as their fellowship with other believers. Scripture warns that consistently associating with those who live in opposition to God’s teachings can lead to spiritual decline, causing one’s love for Christ to diminish (see James 4:4).
No one can remain a Christian without God’s Word. Just as food is essential for our daily sustenance, God’s Word is crucial for maintaining our relationship with Christ Jesus. As Christians, we are called to lead others to Christ, not to allow ourselves to be led away from His Word.
In the story of Martha and Mary, Martha expresses her frustration to Jesus because she feels overwhelmed with her many tasks, while Mary does not help her. Jesus responds to Martha, saying, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but only one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her” (Luke 10:41-42). What is the good portion? The Bible explains that Mary sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to His teaching (Luke 10:39).
Have you chosen the better portion, like Mary did? Has anything distracted you from hearing God’s words? Christ Jesus commended Mary for choosing the good portion. What about us? Isn’t the purpose of our weekly gatherings to keep us focused on His word? Isn’t that also the goal of our Bible study meetups — to engage everyone and foster learning from God’s Word? Is there anything so significant that it should prevent us from learning from Scripture? Complacency is a dangerous path for us as Christians.
At one point, Christ’s earthly family—His mother and brothers—struggled to understand His actions and words. This is illustrated in the Gospel of Mark: “Then Jesus went home, and the crowd gathered again, so much so that He and His apostles could not even eat. When His family heard about this, they went out to take charge of Him, saying, ‘He is out of His mind.’” (Mark 3:20-21)
That’s why Christ said, as we read earlier: “And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household. Whoever loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me. And whoever does not take up his cross and follow Me is not worthy of Me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.” (Matthew 10:36-39)
Christ Jesus personally experienced how His earthly family briefly became a hindrance to His ministry. Therefore, we may say that He spoke from both personal experience and from God’s perspective.
Lot serves as a notable example in this context. When God called Abraham to follow His path, Lot chose to accompany him willingly. As their journey continued, their flocks grew so large that they needed to part ways. Lot settled in Sodom, a city notorious for its rampant sexual immorality. The Scriptures indicate, “Now the men of Sodom were wicked and great sinners against the LORD” (Genesis 13:13). When God decided to punish Sodom, Lot hesitated to leave and had to be forcefully evacuated (Genesis 19:16). This story illustrates how our surroundings and the people we interact with can significantly influence us. Consequently, Christ warns, “And because lawlessness will be increased, the love of many will grow cold” (Matthew 24:12).
Always keep in mind the words of Christ. We all desire for our families and loved ones to know Christ Jesus and attain salvation. However, this can only be accomplished through God’s Word. Essentially, this is what Christ meant when He told His disciples, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible” (Matthew 19:26).
Be discerning and avoid falling into the trap of Satan’s malevolent activities, which are not necessarily the devil himself but his equivalent evil works.
Much like the story of Adam and Eve, the devil takes advantage of human emotions to exploit our weaknesses. Throughout history, the human heart has often served as the devil’s playground. This was demonstrated by Christ Jesus Himself when, for a brief moment, Peter acted as an adversary. By trying to deter Christ from His mission, Peter was hindering Him from dying on the cross—the very act meant for the salvation of all who believe in Him (see Matthew 16:21-23).
As you can see, even Peter became a hindrance to God’s work for salvation. The same goes for Mary and Jesus’ siblings, as I explained earlier. Many times, we fail to recognize that people within our own social circle could act as obstacles, hindering us from following Jesus Christ.
The basic meanings of “Satan” and “the devil” are as follows:
“Satan” means “adversary” or “accuser.” In the Book of Job, Satan accuses God of favoring Job, claiming that Job’s only reason for devotion to God is the divine guidance and care he receives.
On the other hand, “the devil” refers to a “slanderer” and represents the arch-enemy of humanity’s spiritual well-being. Jesus described the unbelieving Jews as “sons of the devil” because they continually distorted God’s word, preventing people from attaining salvation. In this way, they acted like murderers and liars, similar to the devil.
Both definitions are taken from the Easton Bible Dictionary.
God’s design for the family was intended to be a blessing for humanity. However, the devil corrupted this original creation, leading to strife within families. After the fall of Adam, the first murder occurred when Cain killed his brother, Abel. Joseph’s brothers plotted to kill him but ultimately sold him into slavery, causing immense grief for their father, Jacob. Jesus Christ was betrayed by his own disciple, Judas, and by his people, the Jews, who handed him over to be crucified.
Just as Eve became a temptation to Adam by offering him the forbidden fruit, Adam also failed Eve by not protecting her from Satan’s lies. The fall of Adam and Eve occurred because they loved each other more than they loved God, valuing created things more than the Creator Himself. This aligns with Paul’s argument in Romans 1:18-32. Although this passage references Old Covenant Jews, it applies to both Adam and Eve as well as Israel, all of whom had knowledge of God.
Christians should be discerning when faced with temptation and remain committed to the teachings of Christ Jesus, regardless of what may hinder their ability to truthfully follow Him. As Christ said, “Whoever does not take his cross and follow Me is not worthy of Me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.” (Matthew 10:38-39)
In Jewish tradition, the phrase “to lose one’s life” goes beyond just the concept of death; it encompasses a variety of life’s tragedies. This includes experiences such as bankruptcy, a broken marriage, family conflicts, or any unfortunate events and suffering. A prominent example of this is the story of Job, who endured the loss of his family, wealth, and health during his trials. In his despair, Job lamented, “Why did I not die at birth, come out from the womb and expire? Why did the knees receive me? Or why the breasts, that I should nurse? For then I would have lain down and been quiet; I would have slept; then I would have been at rest” (Job 3:11-13). Essentially, Job was expressing that he would be content with death, not because he wished to die, but because in death, he would no longer experience pain and suffering.
In contrast, Jesus’ reference to finding one’s life pertains to the privileges of existence—such as wealth and family—even if these privileges come at the expense of contradicting God’s will; see Luke 12:16-21 as an example.
Again, Jesus Christ said, “If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple. Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple. For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it? Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, saying, ‘This man began to build and was not able to finish.’ Or what king, going out to encounter another king in war, will not sit down first and deliberate whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who comes against him with twenty thousand? And if not, while the other is yet a great way off, he sends a delegation and asks for terms of peace. So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be My disciple.” (Luke 14:26-33)
Christ’s instruction and warning in Matthew 10:34-39 align with the passage in Luke 14:26-33 that you just read. These teachings are not isolated; they are significant and deserve our serious reflection. It’s important to clarify that Jesus is not anti-family. However, our natural inclination towards family can complicate our faith.
Throughout Christian history, many individuals have chosen to follow Christ but not always with their families. Recognizing this dilemma, Paul offered some advice: “To the rest, I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. And if any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise, your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. If the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases, the brother or sister is not bound. God has called you to peace. For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? Let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to them, and to which God has called them. This is my rule in all the churches.” (1 Corinthians 7:12-17)
Paul did not contradict Jesus’ teachings or support divorce. Instead, he encouraged couples to live in harmony and to maintain mutual respect for one another, even if they held differing beliefs. He emphasized that Christians should never compromise their faith and must remain steadfast in their relationship with Christ Jesus. This is what Paul meant when he said, “God has called you to peace.” Similarly, in his instructions in Philippians, Paul urged believers to submit to God’s peace in the midst of inconsequential conflict. This can be seen in Philippians 4:1-7.
Terah, the father of Abraham, decided to live in Haran until his death (Genesis 11:31-32). In Joshua 24:2, it is noted that Terah worshipped other gods. This suggests that one of the reasons Abraham was called to leave Haran was to follow God’s guidance more freely and distance himself from idol worship. Similarly, just as Abraham was called, we too are called to follow Jesus Christ.
It’s ironic, isn’t it? The same tactic has been used against Christians, taking advantage of our natural social connections, yet many still give in to the same temptations. This underscores the frailty of humanity and, unfortunately, reveals that many have never fully understood the profound teachings of God.
Do you understand Christ’s response to Peter’s question: “See, we have left everything to follow you. What, then, will we receive?” (Matthew 19:27)? Jesus replied, “Everyone who has left houses, brothers, sisters, father, mother, children, or lands for My name’s sake will receive a hundredfold and will inherit eternal life.” (Matthew 19:29)
Once again, let me reiterate that Christ Jesus isn’t anti-family. He understands the plight of those wanting to follow Him, which comes with a cost. Are you willing and ready to follow Jesus at all costs?
This message is for those navigating complex family dynamics. Not everyone shares the same faith, and the Apostle Paul encourages us to find peace in God. Abraham found his peace by trusting in and following God’s guidance. Paul also provided advice for couples with differing faiths. Shouldn’t we learn from the examples of Jesus Christ, Abraham, and Paul and apply those principles in our own lives?
Note: Click on underlines and highlights for definitions or Bible references.
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Unlearning Tradition, Relearning Scripture 